|
 February
is a month full of holidays and observances. We have Valentine’s
Day, Groundhog Day, Mardi Gras, Super Bowl Sunday, Presidents Day,
Black History Month, Chinese New Year, American Heart Month,
Humpback Whale Awareness Month, National Engineers Week, Wine with
Your Cat Week, Thank a Mail Carrier Day, National Ice Cream for
Breakfast Day, Who Shall I Be Day, and many more. February is a
combination of history, health, fun and cultural enlightening.
Let me tell you how my February is going. Hmmph! For me it’s
especially difficult this year since my Mac has already gone to
Glory and I am missing him mightily. This was my first Valentine’s
without him. We never did a whole lot for that holiday, but we did,
indeed, celebrate it. In looking for comfort, I found this quote
from Dean Koontz, I’d like to offer to anyone in grief.
“Grief can destroy you….or focus you. You can decide a relationship
was all for nothing if it had to end in death, and you are alone. OR
you can realize that every moment of it had more meaning than you
dared to recognize at the time, so much meaning it scared you, so
you just lived, just took for granted the love and laughter each
day, and didn’t allow yourself to consider the sacredness of it. But
when it’s over and you’re alone, you begin to see that it wasn’t
just a movie and a dinner together, not just watching sunsets
together, not just scrubbing a floor or washing dishes together or
worrying over a high electric bill. It was everything, it was the
why of life, every event and precious moment of it. The answer to
the mystery of existence is the love you shared sometimes so
imperfectly, and when the loss wakes you to the deeper beauty of it,
to the sanctify of it, you can’t get off your knees for a long time,
you’re driven to your knees not by the weight of the loss but by
gratitude for whatever preceded the loss. And the ache is always
there, but one day not the emptiness, because to nurture the
emptiness, to take solace in it, is to disrespect the gift of life.”
That quote got me through Valentine’s Day. Well, with the help from
this quote from online, “Don’t worry about not having a Valentine on
Valentine’s Day. You probably didn’t have a groundhog on Groundhog
Day either.”
As if all the emotional struggle wasn’t enough, I came down with
either food poisoning or the flu. I have no idea which, except to
say….It. Was. Awful.
Writer Megan Boyle said, “Being sick feels like you’re wearing
someone else’s glasses.”
Well, I think I was possessed by someone else. My body exploded from
places I didn’t know could explode. My goodness, our bodies are
wonderous things. Chemist Linus Pauling, “Just one living cell in
the human body is more complex than New York City.”
I believe I had New York City, Minneapolis, Chicago, New Orleans and
Portland fighting it out in my body over the last week.
[to top of second column] |
Psalm 139:14, “I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully
made.”
How true this is. I had no idea if this old body was going to hold
itself together. Again, with this new life of mine, it was the first
time to be alone while this ill. Sure did take the heartache out of
no Valentine.
Trying to praise Him in all things, I was terribly thankful for my
indoor plumbing. I was thankful for my cozy home. I was thankful for
toilet paper…Kleenex….Campbell’s chicken noodle soup….Jello….and my
Mac’s nice warm woolen shirt.
I have two cats and a dog that will always mimic my mood. If I am
relatively healthy and happy…..so are they. If I am ill, all bets
are off. Not only do I have to care for me…..I have to clean up
after their stomach, bladder and stool problems. It was not a happy
home around here for a few days. The four of us slept, were ill,
complained, and stumbled through a week of malady and affliction.
It, of course, was a week of both the gargantuan garbage cans to be
maneuvered to the curb. I debated on leashing my Augie dog up to
one, as the Grinch did his Max in “How the Grinch Stole Christmas”,
but didn’t have the energy. As I began toting, my sweet neighbor
hollered across the street, “Leave those alone! I’ll get them!”
Normally, I would have refused but was feeling so terrible, I burst
into tears of gratitude. I apologized and slinked back into the
house. I’ll bake her cookies when I feel better, and we will sit and
laugh about life.
I called my friend, Shanon, and told her I was dying. She cheerfully
offered to bring me groceries and antacids. Yes. She’s a retired
nurse. I think they yank all medical fear and sympathy out of a
nurse’s soul upon their graduation from nursing school. It replaced
with good will, common sense, and a bit of delight in the
cunningness of the patient.
I also called my son who is a nurse and he advised me to do my best
to keep living.
Funny Nurse Quotes, “I’m a nurse. What’s your superpower?” “Yes, I’m
a nurse. No, I don’t want to look at it.” “Nurses can’t fix
stupid…but we can sedate it.”
As I’m up and taking nourishment, I think I can get through the rest
of this February. I have my birthday to get through without my Mac
before this month is over and I don’t look forward to that, but….
This, too, shall pass.
Coach Vince Lombardi, “The darkest moments of our lives are not to
be buried and forgotten, rather they are a memory to be called upon
for inspiration to remind us of the unrelenting human spirit and our
capacity to overcome the intolerable.”
L. Maxine McQueen may be contacted at
maxmac.1@juno.com |
